Mad Mike Reviews TNA: Sting’s Done And So Am I

Greetings Mayhemmers, since I’m the guy who watches TNA the most as the main hosts on this show, but we never seem to talk about it (mainly because it sucks) I decided to at least use my journalistic integrity and live blog about it each week. This will be written live as I watch Impact, so enjoy!

Also as a bonus, AJ was also watching Impact this week so I shall chime in with his thoughts as well, via his twitter feed @ajinpgh.

AJ: You know what happens when I don’t have female supervision? I end up watching TNA. This is why I can’t be single.

And yet this probably explains why I AM single…on with the show!!

Segment 1: Recrap, Roode segment, Red and Blue backstage, Match 1: Red and Blue Vs. Joe/Magnus

• As much as I love Roode, TNA needs a different way to open the show
• AJ: Who’s holding the boo/cheer/chant signs in the Impact Zone?
• I honestly don’t blame Sting for tweeting “I’m done.” I’ve wanted to tweet that for months
• It’s funny that this crowd gets an insight into future tweets, since this was filmed like 3 weeks ago
• Oh wow a Morgan/Crimson feud…just what no one wanted
• AJ: Christy Hemme needs to work on her pronunciation. I thought Magnus’ name was Madness.
• Joe and Magnus’ title win would have been much more impressive if they won on their first try
• I would have really preferred if this was Crimson and Amazing Red as a team

Segment 2: Match cont.

• AJ: The announcer for TNA’s store sounds like he’s gargling marbles.
• I never want to hear Taz talking about flesh pounding on flesh
• That was the best of the match these teams have had…but what other teams are there now?

Segment 3: Brandon Jacobs segment

• AJ: That Direct Auto Insurance commercial was funnier when it was Terry Tate Office Linebacker/Reebok
• Without the Giants shirt, no one knows who Jacobs is
• AJ: Brandon Jacobs shouldn’t be allowed to talk on a microphone. This is worse than Diva promos.
• AJ: Oh hey! A backup running back from the Giants! Superstars!
• No idea why Florida fans would be cheering a Giants player
• Wow, this is really awful
• I can’t tell if Jacobs is reading a teleprompter or if he is just fixated by the red light on the camera
• I don’t even think Bully can make this work
• That’s it?

Segment 4: Match 2: Shiima Vs. Shelley

• AJ: Oh holy crap Zema Ion.
• AJ: Man, when did Alex Shelley get Parkinson’s?
• This is clearly going to be the best part of the show…how do I know this? Aries brought out popcorn to watch
• Popcorn and wine! Aries is a classy man
• How is Aries so charismatic just by watching a match?
• Shiima with the hair spray to the face!
• God if there was a real booker in TNA he’d make Shelley Vs. Shiima Vs. Aries two out of three falls triple threat

Segment 5: Garret segment,Madison segment

• God this guy is awful
• AJ: Honestly what the hell is this. Apparently Hogan had this talk with his own kids.
• I think was the last segment AJ watched, and I don’t blame him….this segment always makes me want to kill myself
• I freaking love Maddy, she’s phenomenal
• This was about Hogan, AJ: Gotta be honest. If you have a taped promo, you have EVERY chance to not sound terrible. Wow that was bad.

Segment 6: Match 3: Gail Vs. ODB, AJ segment

• Nice to see how illinformed Taz is on Chris Brown
• Why is Gail dressed like a softcore porn star?
• Well that was an awfully boring match
• Hey AJ…stop focusing on Daniels

Segment 7: Sorensten Update, Match 4: TV Championship match?? AJ Vs. Robbie E

• I hope Jesse can recover 100%
• TNA remembered they had this title?
• Wow,l AJ lost to Robbie…don’t care the cirucmstances, that’s jsut awful

Segment 8: Match 6: Jeff/Storm Vs. Bully/Anlge

• Man TNA needs to work harder I’m falling asleep through this
• Jacobs needs to go back to getting stopped by defensive lines

Segment 9: Match cont

• As thankful as I am to have Hardy out of the title scene for right now, this is awful
• Oh good another no contest in a TNA main event
• Oh….so its totally okay for a table to be brought in, Jacobs to chokeslam Bully, and no disqualification is called….fine then
• If anything I guess its a nice SportsCenter moment for them

Segment 10: Sting segment

• So this whole stupid segment is to show us that Sting puts his facepaint on the way Jeff dives into his coke? Got it.
• I hope this “pile of vomit” Sting is referring to is this show
• Didn’t Sting just wrestle Roode in a tag match in England?

TNH8 Scale

Logic: 3 Russos of out 5

Wrestling: 3 Russos out of 5

Overall: 6 Russos out of 10