Okay so I’m watching this episode after Raw…and the #pipebombshell AJ dropped, so this should be hilarious.
Segment 1
- Hey Eva…..John is kinda seeing someone, also aren’t you kinda engaged?
- Roman Reigns should have speared both of them
- Birthday mentions: 1
- I’m pretty sure that it’s a creepy Canadian thing that Tyson’s mom wants to sleep with Nattie
- Cameron….shut the fuck up, unless you are paying for Naomi’s new shit, shut the fuck up
- Cameron had to really rehearse that “Girl bye!” for a long time
- Birthday mentions: 2
- Birthday mentions: 3
- Birthday mentions: 4
- If Nattie taught the Bellas how to wrestle and the Bellas taught Nattie how to be a Diva, it’s no wonder they all suck
- Birthday mentions: 5 and 6
- NOT THE CROSSFACE TYSON!! NOT THE CROSSFACE!!!!
- Birthday mentions: 7
- Birthday mentions: 8
Segment 2
- Cameron…stop saying fucking “work” when you don’t even know HOW TO FUCKING WORK
- God damn Nikki…..how do you confuse Stalin for Churchill?
- Cena knows Chinese? That’s a new wrinkle for his gimmick
- Birthday mentions: 9
- Tyson’s mom looks really strung out
- 12 years is rushing a wedding? I’m gonna present that opinion to my girlfriend and see what she thinks.
- P.S. I’ll probably single soon if I do that…..ladies
- Naomi is fucking athletic as shit
- “It’s not about the moves” sums up why people hate the divas division
Segment 3
- Birthday mentions: 10
- There are too many people who have J’s in their name on the show: JoJo, John, Jaret, TJ, etc.
- HOW DO YOU NOT GO VISIT YOUR GRANDFATHER’S GRAVE IN SIX YEARS???
- So we should be blaming your grandfather for the woman you are today Nikki?
- CURSE YOU POP POP!!
- Birthday mentions: 11 and 12
- For being together 12 years, it sure seems like Tyson and Nattie have an awful relationship
- Birthday mentions: 13 and 14
- Odd shout out to Nancy Grace…
- Birthday mentions: 15
- Cameron…..stop saying fucking anything, you say “boo boo face” I wanna punch you in the neck
- JoJo’s line for this episode: Aw, yay.
- Cameron has to be like a 13 year old child right?
- Seriously…JoJo is the only likable person on this show besides Cena and Bryan, and that’s because she doesn’t talk
Segment 4
- Birthday mentions: 16 and 17
- P.S. Jaret looks like Tyson with the mumps
- Jaret hitting on an engaged woman adds to the list of horrible people
- Hee. He said “do do”
- The Bellas should be booked from Brawley, California….just sayin
- Their brother’s name is JJ? Oh come the fuck on J is not that popular of a letter!
- Look at that fedora…..wow
Segment 5
- FAKE ACTING.
- FAAAAAAAKE AAAAAAAAAAAACTIIIIIIIING
- The Bellas’ dad’s lisp is hilarious
- Turning down a match on Raw because you had a little tiff is always a great idea
- Yelling at each other in front of your bosses is always a good idea
- Stephanie is “top lady” I’m sure she loves being called that
- Stephanie must hate this shit
- I’d rather see a reality show about Sandra, the seamstress lady
- Brie seems like a good person, especially when she says to not say “Team BooBoos”
- Naomi is clearly the better wrestler of the two Funkadactyls, and Nattie is being a horrible person…but at least she didn’t say it was her birthday
- TAG TEAM WRESTLING IS REAL FRIENDSHIPS YALL
- Next week: THE JOJO STORYLINE AND FALLING FUCKING BELLAS!!!!!! YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES