Greetings Mayhemmers, since I’m the guy who watches TNA the most as the main hosts on this show, but we never seem to talk about it (mainly because it sucks) I decided to at least use my journalistic integrity and live blog about it each week. This will be written live as I watch Impact, so enjoy!
Segment 1: Recrap, Jeff’s drug rage, Match 1: Velvet Vs. Tara Vs. Mickie
- Clearly someone sold Jeff some bad drugs, he’s attacking Bully
- Awkward rose petal placement in this segment
- Roode couldn’t open the door to his car
- I wish this wasn’t going to be four way and we were actually going to get Storm Vs Roode one-on-one
- That being said I wonder when the last time TNA mainevented a PPV with homegrown talent only, AJ Vs Abyss?
- To be fair Jeff was the one who started the fight
- They really should announce this is a number one contender’s match
Segment 2: Match cont
- The TNA commercials show the least amount of merch I’ve ever seen
- Labia count: 1
- Nice finish to the match, but I really don’t wanna see Tara get a title shot
Segment 3: Sting segment, Shelley segment
- Why would you just show the whole fight that just happened?
- It really takes a lot of sting (no pun intended) out of these main event announcement segments, because its announced right after Jail ends, lessens the impact a lot (pun intended)
- God this segment is awful
- Shelley Vs Shiima is going to be a great match
Segment 4: EY Segment, Match 2: Shiima Vs Shelley
- Haha Eric was wearing a cup, love that gimmick
- This match should be the highlight of the show
- Shiima does Taker’s slit throat gesture with his hair spray, fantastic
- I wish I could buy TNA PPVs by the match, because I’d buy ten copies of Shelley vs Aries at AAO
- “Cut the cameras!!!” Shiima you are a god
- Great match, wish they had 5 more minutes but what can you do?
- God that light makes Tara looks old as fuck
Segment 5: Bischoff gym segment, Match 3: Worst Lesbians Vs. ODBEY
- I’m going to take time out during this segment I don’t care about to say that Carly looks nice in the front row today, but sadly she isn’t going to England…I don’t think
- Wow at least that was fucking short, hint: it’s totally Hogan…and no one will care
- I forgot to point out earlier that Winter said her and Angelina were easy…just throwing that out there
Segment 6: Match cont
- SPIKE TV NEEDS TO STOP SHPWING PREVIEWS OF THE FUCKING GREY
- Winter looks like she got a tan recently
- I think I’ve finally figured this out….EY is just being the dude from Hangover, we need to get him some roofies and a baby STAT
- Wow ODB fucked up the Bronco buster…that’s awful
- Wow such a boring match, from such entertaining people
Segment 7: Match 4: Joe Vs Morgan
- Magnus really is the indy wrestler version of Hugh Jackman
- That new Morgan shirt is awful
- Morgan really is the third most boring wrestler on this roster, his tag partner is second, and first is Garret
- Wow Joe jobbed to a clothesline??
Segment 8: Jeff/Storm segment, AJ segment
- These two look like the toughest bums living under a bridge ever
- I’d hate to see how AJ treats his dogs
- This whole angle is just stupid
- God, this is the worst…there’s no way this will ever pay off
- I think Daniels borrowed some of Winter’s rape medication to control Kaz
Segment 9: Match 5: Main Event tables match
- This split screen shit is fine for TNA but do they need the retarded flames thing?
- This is just a continuation of the same boring four man fight with their gear on
Segment 10: Match cont
- That was a cool boot through the table spot
- All in all that wasn’t a bad match
- Well my DVR ended but I’m assuming the heels put a face through a table
TNH8 Scale
Logic: 4 Russos out of 5
Wrestling: 3 Russos out of 5
Overall: 7 Russos out of 10