First Segment
- Holy shit, this show is an hour?
- “We are Broadway bodyslams.” – Nikki…….what the fuck does this even mean?
- Ariane and Trinity?? What the balls is this?
- Okay, this first episode starts 10 days before Mania…you know for reference
- The Bellas train with each other in an empty ring, this explains so much
- Wait…wait…a Funkadactyl is engaged to an Uso? This screams of a prehistoric stable.
- Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart has a name tag of “Nattie’s Dad” wow.
- Nattie is training someone who is flailing around so much, I can’t even see who it is
- Cena teaching Nikki how to fish….I can’t even
- Man, I kinda feel bad for Cena for having to reenact a scene from the Notebook
- Brie and Bryan have an adorable dog
- Cena got Nikki a fucking Range Rover….I am now no longer feeling bad for him
- Sucks that Nattie missed the whole Hall of Fame because she was at Axxess
- Why the hell did Nattie even think she was gonna be at Wrestlemania?
Second Segment
- JoJo looks like a rejected Cosby kid
- Eva Marie is very pretty
- Poor Nattie is training the robots that will replace her
- Hey Nattie…Summer Rae is blonde also, you might not know her because she’s on TV
- HAHAHAHA Brodus told everyone they sucked, that’s hilarious….Tensai must just be shaking his head
- Oh man Cameron’s meathead boyfriend wants to fight Brodus, hilarious
Third Segment
- Ummm Nikki…..you are a FUCKING IDENTICAL TWIN…the reason that someone else looks like you is your whole gimmick
- Also Eva Marie is fucking hotter than you
- I would have liked to see the incident that Brodus yelled at Cameron for
- I have just now decided to refuse to use the Funkadactyl’s real names
- HAHAHAHA Eva Marie does kinda look like Mufasa
Fourth Segment
- That red hair totally works
- Eva Marie needs to stop the D’Lo head waggle though
- I wonder if they just wanted a blonde with Fandango and it was supposed to be Eva Marie so she could be on TV the same time the show is on
- The Bellas as “veterans” hurts my heart, especially watching Nattie
- Hey Boobs Bella….Cena JUST HAD HIS DIVORCE FINALIZED…..slow your fucking roll, bitch
Fifth Segment
- This is probably a reason why significant others aren’t allowed backstage often
- “Up in my Kool-Aid” Is that racist?
- Poor Cena looked so awkward for a guy who has usually kept his personal life so close to the vest
- If Bryan brings up that he is too much of a chickenshit to marry Boobs Bella, that might be the only way I’d want this show implemented
- Proof that the Bellas actually watch tape
- I wonder if the seamstresses were told that the Mixed Tag might be cut
Sixth Segment
- Ah so they were supposed to be the buffer after Taker and Punk….nice to see that
- It’s weird to say this because I basically hate three out of these four women after this first show, but I wanted to see that Mixed Tag match
Seventh Segment
- Wow it would have been these “veterans” first Wrestlemania match? What veterans…
- So Layla is still continuing her comforting others gimmick
- Coming soon on Total Divas: JUSTIN FUCKING GABRIEL!!!
- The only thing that the coming soon told me is this is going to be an interesting show, I hope Tha Trademarc makes an appearance