Greetings Mayhemmers, since I’m the guy who watches TNA the most as the main hosts on this show, but we never seem to talk about it (mainly because it sucks) I decided to at least use my journalistic integrity and live blog about it each week. This will be written live as I watch Impact, so enjoy!
THIS IS THE ULTIMATUM: IF JEFF HARDY WINS THE TITLE AT BFG, I WILL STOP REVIEWING TNA UNLESS THE PRODUCT IS SUDDENLY AMAZING.
Segment 1: Recrap, Angle and AJ Segment, Match 1: Angle/AJ Vs. Chavo/Hernandez
- Someone please challenge Shaq to a fight
- I want to point out…I could have gone to this show, I was in Florida…and refused
- Carly is in the Impact Zone! Fuck I should have gone!
- TNA needs to stop showing long entrances or shorten people’s entrances
- I’m excited for Impact that they are going to be live the rest of the year, it’s honestly a good thing for them
- Chavo will never escape Eddie’s shadow
Segment 2: Match cont, Al Snow segment
- Taz doesn’t know what puns are
- Why do I have a feeling Team Appletini is gonna cause a no contest?
- The worst angle ever would be for Chavo to blame Eddie for costing him matches, because he points up high every time he tries a frog splash
- Well whatdayaknow? A no contest! Yawn.
- Watch out it’s wifflebat Hogan!
- Um…..you guys, wasn’t Hogan wearing red and yellow just like five minutes ago?
- Did we really need to hear about Al’s haircut?
- Ugh more Gut Check bullshit
Segment 3: Hogan segment, Gut Check bullshit
- Why the hell does it take someone an hour to get through security?
- There should be an age limit for Gut Check
Segment 4: Dixie segment, Gut Check match
- Holy fucking bad audio sync!
- I already wanna punch this kid in the dick
- Wrestlefan looks older than this kid
- I’m begging one of these Gut Check people to actually win a match for once
- Hi Douglas Williams! Can you please go join William Regal or Drew McIntyre in WWE please?
Segment 5: Storm segment
- Nice CM Punk shirt right in the hard camera view
- Remember when Storm was good at the beginning of the year? Yeah…that’s done now
- Remember when Bobby Roode wasn’t so stale and bland? Yeah…
- Are they really wasting an entire segment on this?? Really?
- I’d rather see Three Minute Warning than this
Segment 6: Match 3: Roode Vs Storm, Hogan segment
- This is fucking awful
- Storm is such a chickenshit, he waited til Roode’s arms were behind his back
- That’s just fucking retarded, I’m pretty sure those hipster shoes aren’t gonna hurt anyone
- You stay classy Impact zone
- I love/hate when Taz tries to point out the idiocies of TNA
- So this is just “use Open Fights Night to book the PPV” night? Awesome. Not.
- Second no contest of the night….
- How did Aces and Assholes get the cell number of Hogan? And why doesn’t he just have someone trace the number?
Segment 7: Aries segment, Tara segment, Match 3: Tara Vs. Christy
- Jeez…this is just the Punk thing again, ugh
- I wonder if Aries has actually seen where Jeff lives…..it’s a fucking trailer
- “She’s a workin girl” wow…stay classy Orlando
- Does anyone care about Tara? Is she just the last one left who can’t go back to WWE?
- So wait…why didn’t Hogan threaten Christy to go fight?
Segment 8: Brooke segment, Hogan segment
- Brooke doesn’t know big words like “repercussions” or “ramifications”
- Hogan…..YOU KNOW THEY DON’T KEEP THEIR WORD!
- If Joseph Park was on his way into the arena, how did Aces and Assholes get to him?
- Who is playing the stupid music under Aces and Asshole’s feed?
- Wow…that was just bad
Segment 9: Jeff package, Aries segment, Match 4: Aries Vs. Bully
- I don’t care about Jeff Hardy
- I hope Aries doesn’t try to do as many drugs as Jeff does
- Bully and Aries are trying to shine this turd of a show
Segment 10: Match cont
- Unless they make it a three-way, the saddest thing is now it seems TNA has no plans for Bully for BFG
- These Open Fight Nights used to have some of the best wrestling, this has definitely not been the case tonight
- Nice to see Bully get a win, maybe this will go to a three-way after all
TNH8 Scale
Logic: 1 out of 5 Laganas
Wrestling: 1.5 Laganas out of 5
(Bully Vs. Aries: 3.5 our of 5 Laganas)
Overall (with inflation for one good match): 3.5 Laganas out of 10
STILL ON NOTICE….AND TRENDING DOWNWARD