Greetings Mayhemmers, since I’m the guy who watches TNA the most as the main hosts on this show, but we never seem to talk about it (mainly because it sucks) I decided to at least use my journalistic integrity and live blog about it each week. This will be written live as I watch Impact, so enjoy!
Segment 1: Intro and Anderson segment
- Jeff Hardy returns tonight…live from prison, not really…but that’d be a lot better TV
- So now he’s imitating Fat Bastard?
- So…this feud with Bully Ray is going on still, yet Anderson is getting a title shot? Please don’t tell me Anderson Vs Bully isn’t gonna be the BFG main event, PLEASE??
- If Anderson says “rematch” in one more fucking promo I’m going to burn down the city of Greeeeen Baaaaaaay Wisconsiiiiiiiin
- It’s really a great idea to trust the crazy guy that is imitating The Joker, isn’t that right every villain in Gotham?
- I hate how “enforcer” means “legal run in”
Segment 2: Match 1: British Invasion Vs. D-Von and Pope
- Oh fuck, MeX-Pac is on commentary this week
- Weren’t British Invasion faces like 3 weeks ago?
- For two guys who were “taken out” by Joe, D-Von and Pope look pretty healthy…I think D-Von still had enough points to be in the BFG Series finals
- MeX-Pac needs to stop being a bad Chavo ripoff, I wish they would just hire Chavo
- I cannot believe this Sting Vs. Flair match is on free TV….that is just completely ridiculous
- This may be a subtle thing, but WWE’s tag matches always keep the face tag teams on the hard camera side, sometimes I forget D-Von is even over there
- Is this the first show D-Von couldn’t get his kids ringside seats for?
Segment 3: BFG Finals hype and in-ring promo
- Considering its increasingly likely that Angle will be champion, I don’t think either Storm or Roode are ready for a big title match…as much as I like Roode
- Shouldn’t this just be a tag team match, since you know its Fortune Vs. Immortal?
- I’m pretty sure Shawn Michaels once asked “how good could I be on my own?”
- This whole speech of Bully Ray would make sense if Storm and Roode were fighting each other at the PPV….but they aren’t
- Seriously out of all the possible combinations they could have, Bully Vs. Anderson and Roode Vs. Kurt are the only ones that make sense
- Putting Sting in this championship match at No Surrender makes no sense since you already possibly have a match slated for him at Bound For Glory, if he won the belt, would Sting wrestle twice?
Segment 4: Eric Young Vs. Robbie E
- MMA Fighter number A is on commentary….no one cares
- Umm is Eric wearing a pair of Robbie’s tights?
- Jesus that was a quick match
- Wow quick commercial jump…TNA really needs to cut better
Segment 5: RVD and Lynn; Velvet segment
- Is Jerry Lynn even signed to TNA?
- Guess not.
- Oh man are they turning Velvet heel again?
- Karen telling Velvet to lose some of her ass? OH HELL NAW! I’M TAKING OFF MAI RANGS!!
Segment 6: Match 3: Anderson Vs. Angle
- I just realized TNA books Impacts further in advance than they do PPVs…that’s a problem on so many levels
- Ok…that was actually a three count after the Kenton Bomb
- Oh wow, another clusterfuck finish…who’d have thunk it? Say what you will but the last couple of World title matches on WWE TV have been clean finishes
Segment 7: Immortal segment; Match 4: Winter/Angelina Vs Mickie/Velvet
- Karen dancing on a table in front of a room full of men, that’s the most comfortable she’s ever looked on TNA TV
- I also envy the second rope
- Wow they really just redid the finish from their first title match?
Segment 8: Austin Aries segment; Hogan segment
- Austin Aries better win this damn championship
- Did Kendrick just steal Alex Riley’s gimmick?
- In that suit Kendrick really does look like Drew McIntyre
- I wonder if the voices in Kendrick’s head and Orton’s head ever talk to each other
- So the face sucker punches the heel…again? This is backwards
- I think Hogan is really Mumm-Ra
- 3 Days before the PPV a main event is finally announced
Segment 9: PPV Rundown; Match 5: Fatal Four Way (for what reason?) Storm Vs Roode Vs Bully Vs Gunner
- Half of these matches at least were just made tonight, this company is fucked
- What exactly was Joe gonna do? take all four guys out? I still don’t think he would have been in the top 4, especially since D-Von and Pope are already back
- So this is essentially treated like a tornado tag anyway…
- Ha! Nice to see Gunner screw over Bully
Segment 10: Jeff Hardy
- I will say this Jeff does look partially sober
- Nice to see he got a new t-shirt, ugh
- Rock Bottom will probably be sitting that jail cell when you are supposed to be doing a run-in on a PPV
- As penance, Jeff Hardy should have to do X-Divison jobs for a year
- Wow, that was it…great go home for the PPV