Greetings Mayhemmers, since I’m the guy who watches TNA the most as the main hosts on this show, but we never seem to talk about it (mainly because it sucks) I decided to at least use my journalistic integrity and live blog about it each week. This will be written live as I watch Impact, so enjoy!
Segment 1: Hogan Segment, Gail Kim segment, Match 1: Maddy and Gail Vs ODBEY
- Jesus Christ….he’s actually showing the runsheet, make it stop
- Way to promote that, right before your live show, the entire show is scripted
- Hardy is sleeping during the meeting
- Hogan is right about one thing, Impact doesn’t work in its current format
- The music over this segment is fucking annoying
- If Hogan thinks Roode is so bad, why doesn’t he just strip Roode of the belt?
- The most over character in the room is eliminated first…well played
- I don’t understand why Open Fight Night is such a big deal when we have championship matches on Impact all the time? Shouldn’t they be special?
- OHHHHHHHH FUCK YOU GUYS….CARLY’S IN THE IMPACT ZONE!
- Carly is the most important woman in that company Gail….not you
- Gail is seriously the worst woman on the microphone in TNA
- “Mr. and Mrs. ODB” is pretty great though
- How are they just mentioning now that they’re going live? I mean that should be a huge announcement.
- Labia count: 1
- Oh God that Brooke Hogan quick promo makes me want to vomit
Segment 2: Match cont
- Labia count: 2
- I’d actually really laugh if somehow Maddy’s crush was Eric Young
- And such a throwaway announcement of Brooke Hogan being in charge of the Knockouts
- Wow, what a controversial finish…I wonder if next week there will be someone in charge who can fix that??
Segment 3: Hogan segment, Match 2: RVD vs. Gunner
- Oh gee…I bet it’s Sting, who the shizz cares?
- Wow, actually recalling a history with someone? +1 Logic points TNA!
- This sucks though because now it means we have to watch Gunner
- That was some amazing distance for Van Dam on that 5 Star
Segment 4: Match 3: Devon Vs. Gareeettt
- Jesus, first a Gunner match and now a Gaaaaaret match? TNA is trying to kill me
- Oh thank God for the Robbies
- Did I just say that?
Segment 5: Hogan segment, Abyss package, Bully Ray segment, Gut Check segment
- To be fair, Angle is the logical choice as he is the guy who….you know…..BEAT BOBBY ROODE
- I don’t like these “work shoot” segments with Hogan, especially when there is no reason he can’t put everyone in there with Roode, if it’s that important to stop Bobby
- This Abyss thing really needs to go somewhere soon
- Nice to see who Bully’s ring rat is….good closeup on her
- At least Tenay pointed out that Open Fight Night doesn’t apply to audience members…otherwise I’d go there and challenge Carly to a little one-on-one
- Hey Impact Zone, STOP WITH THE FUCKING YES CHANTS
- Um…..Abyss was on the show two weeks ago, why didn’t you call off the case then?
- I do have to give credit to Abyss/Park as he is doing a hell of a job with this angle, even if it running a bit too long
- Joey Ryan eh? I’ve heard of him before…I bet he gets a contract too. BTW when have we seen the last dude who won a contract?
- THAT’S RIGHT….WE HAVEN’T! What is the point of winning a contract if you aren’t going to be on TV?
Segment 6: Gut Check match: Joey Ryan vs A Double
- Joey Ryan looks like Rick Martel fucked Ben Stiller’s character from Dodgeball
- Alex Silva has not been on TV since he won a contract…just sayin
- Tenay, clearly the judges don’t care if the guy wins or loses, Silva lost to Robbie fucking E
- Ryan looked better than Silva did in his match, so I’d almost guarantee he won’t get the contract
Segment 7: Hogan’s decision, World Title match
- KURT. ANGLE. BEAT. ROBERT. ROODE.
- Hogan is a fucking idiot
Segment 8: Match cont.
- It seems odd that this main event match started in the 7th segment, especially with all the hype given
- Then again these segments have been short as hell
- You know, something I didn’t even think about…if AJ is being accused of banging the owner, what does it say for the guy in charge to give him a title shot?
- Wow…a cutaway from this perhaps record setting title match?
Segment 9: Match cont
- This is a really good match, can’t fault the in-ring stuff tonight, that coupled with the crispness of the segments makes me feel they could do live TV right this time
- If live Impact means more nice, long matches like this I’m all for it
- Wow…..shockingly a clean finish, well played Impact, well played
- Worst tease ever, come back and see if Hogan drinks
Segment 10: Final segment
- I think Roode poured a little bit too much of that champagne over his face
- You didn’t stack the deck at all, you gave him a normal one on one match against a guy he’s beaten
- Good thing that young kid Sting needed a push
- The people in the Impact Zone must be confused since this was filmed a week or so ago
- A lumberjack match to open live TV….but they didn’t say if it was for the championship or not, interesting
Logic: 3 Laganas out of 5
Wrestling: 5 Laganas out of 5
Carlys: 15 Carlys out of 10
Overall: 8 Laganas out of 10