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Mad Mike Reviews Total Divas: Wedding Fever!!!

Better late than never, I’m reviewing the mid season finale of this show. Keep in mind, I just watched Impact…so I might be a tad surly.

Segment 1

  • Before I get into this, I feel bad for Nattie because her cat passed away today
  • Who brings a dress to someone days before the wedding using white chair covers for weddings, especially presumable a mom goes with a bride to pick out the dress
  • Hahahahahahaha Vagina Rose!!
  • Valets should technically do a lot more than that Eva
  • Jojo just said Eva has big tits…no idea what she means
  • imagesCool to see that Cena is so carefree about saying his brother is gay

Segment 2

  • Hey Nikki maybe that’s why you shouldn’t fucking wear flip flops when you are on crutches
  • Cameron….that man is your fucking boss, stop being a fucking child
  • Natalya….dope wrestler
  • Jojo…you have already been on TV, and you fucked it all up
  • If I were Nikki I’d have gone to the wedding, you can always meet family in increments
  • Jojo is being a spoiled 19 year old brat, does she forget that she was already on TV?

Segment 3

  • Eva believes that a prayer about her not showing off her panties is appropriate
  • If Nattie applies a sharpshooter on Brie in her wedding dress, that’d be the best reception ever
  • Cameron probably just has to take a big shit

Segment 4

  • God first Cameron had a UTI and a yeast infection, not she’s got more lady problems
  • Eva…you and JoJo should fucking WATCH WRESTLING
  • I’ve seen them “train” together once

Segment 5

  • Nattie what did you expect with an outdoor wedding in Florida…it rains all the time there
  • Eva…what the fuck are you wearing to a God damned wedding?!!?!
  • Nattie how do you not expect Cameron to bring her plus one?
  • Johnny Fabulous!!!!!
  • Wow…fantastic Stewie impression by John’s gay brother
  • Bryan is the only mother fucker to dress down for the wedding, I love it
  • Way to dress up Jaret…I mean come on, don’t try to our D-Bry D-Bry
  • Totally not bad luck for a groom to see the bride before the wedding

Segment 6

  • Nattie totally brought this on herself FYI
  • Sandow needs to host my eventual wedding please
  • Ok Jon Uso is dressed way more casually
  • Wow…Nattie is carrying her cat down the aisle…this is fucking pathetic
  • I’m waiting for this minister to tear off his mask to reveal it’s Eric Bischoff
  • Tyson Kidd’s new gimmick needs to be Mr. Wilson from Dennis the Menace

Segment 7

  • Sandow is the perfect MC for a wedding
  • Um….isn’t Brie already engaged?
  • So…WWE put together a Hart Dynasty package
  • Nattie you probably shouldn’t dance with that dude at your wedding
  • Cena wants Nikki to move in?
  • trapSee you guys again November 17th

WAIT WAIT WAIT….THIS SHOW MUST CONTINUE!!!!

Segment 1.a

  • Renee Young!!!!!! OMG this is the best show ever!!!
  • I’ve driven a rental car without being able to rent one…just FYI JoJo
  • Does “wrestling” mean “sex” or does it mean wrestling?
  • Jaret doesn’t know how to wrestle…it definitely means sex
  • Oh shit…sorry Cameron, that does really suck if it’s true
  • Renee, don’t say “that being said” you are better than that
  • Nikki dressed up as a sexy nurse…so that’s a thing

Segment 2.a

  • Renee said the surprise guest is explosive, I immediately shouted “IT’S GOTTA BE KANE!!”
  • Brie is jealous that Bryan is getting more popular
  • Jurdy Uso…wave of the future
  • Wow…Cena isn’t even main eventing this show, that’s weird
  • “Are you going to propose?” “No.”
  • #CenaBurn
  • God damn Cena…that was a good speech
  • So Jaret is fucking main eventing this show?

Segment 3.a

  • Ha the two John/Jon’s left because they actually have things to do
  • Hahahahahaaha this is the only time Nikki’s constant talking is fantastic
  • Is he the ULTIMATE opportunist?? Jaret should Spear TJ and attack his injured foot

Segment 4.a

  • It’s funny to watch the Bellas react to the Summerslam finish
  • Nice to see Eva actually training with a ring around
  • Thank you Renee Young, please be on all of the Total Divas shows